One other thing you may have noticed me embracing lately (besides recreational drug use...kidding...) -- at least between that last paragraph and yesterday's post -- is my newly gratuitous use of the registered trademark symbol -- ®. Don't mind that. I'm just trying to demonstrate for potential advertisers how effortlessly -- and
In fact, so very much is The Anti DC like a rock, er, Like a Rock® that, if given the chance, it will sink pretty easily. However, much like a snappy Timex® watch, this blog can Take a Licking and Keep on Ticking®. Except, actually, unlike the eternal functionality of an attractive Timex® watch, when it comes to the sick and twisted sh*t spewed forth on this blog, its more like Will Gladly Take a Licking (*wink*) Despite That Ticking, Which Is Just the Sound of Its Writer Self-Destructing, Cool? (I should trademark that.)
Ha! Gotchya! I won't self-destruct as long as I have a refreshing and delicious beverage, like a Coca-Cola®, within reach. Indeed, I am choosing to Live on Coke Side of Life®. (Which is a bit fishy because I don't even drink soda!) But whoa! It's so energetic on this side! In the last three seconds I just typed this sentence, cleaned my closet and made a seven-course meal (all of which featured beans as the main ingredient, of course)! And now I'm surfing the Web at warp speed! And I'm finding quite the lot of awesome/ridiculous (awsiculous? ridiculsome?) stuff! And hey! I just happened to learn how to count in Dutch! I'm multi-tasking! And not hungry at all! (Too bad. That bean-centric chef's menu is divine!) Let's effing do this! Yeah! YEAH! YEEEEAAAAAHHHH! Yeah...
Damn, the buzz wore off. Anyway...
Een! You know what really killed my coke, oops, Coke® buzz? This ridiculous excuse for a new bar going up in Adams Morgan. Via Washington City Paper via The 42 blog, I've learned that sad excuse for a neighborhood is getting even sadder (read: even more like Georgetown). There's going to be a new bar on 18th that requires you to be a douche just to get inside! From "The Town Tavern" official door policy memo: "Gentleman: Collared Shirts Only." So really, this is no different from any other bar on 18th...except for Pharmacy Bar! (No surprise! I heart that place.)
Twee! Oh. My. God. I think I stumbled upon Napoleon Dynamite had he been a baby boomer. I can't tell if this is real or not, but it is AWESOME.
Drie! While it's hard to follow-up with anything that can match the greatness that is "Little Wings" (see above, seriously), New York magazine comes close with a slideshow of pre-Fall 2009 designer shoes. And if you don't care about shoes (but did you see those menswear-inspired loafers by rag & bone?!), you can click on the upcoming link for another classic by Mark Gormley of "Little Wings" fame; it's called "Without You." Please notice how "intense" it is. (Thanks Clusterfck. What would I ever do without you?)
Vier! Uh, the New Yorker published a picture of Rep. Barney Frank (D-Crazy) with him giving an excellent, nay, stellar example of "gang bang face."
Vijf! Lastly, allow me to leave you not with a link or yet another reference to "gang bang face" (although that ditty will never get old to me), but with a message. A message of hope. Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is!® Alka Seltzer®! Have a lovely looooooong weekend!