And I'm sorry that I'm using such a crass metaphor (please direct all complaints to The Anti DC's creative director, Terry the Tourette's Turtle), but I'm trying to get a point across here. We're treated like convicted felons even though we're the ones getting our rights trampled on. And what's our crime? As far as I can tell, for most of us it's simply choosing to live within a reasonable distance to our employers. Stupid.
But actually, many convicted felons have it better, as once they've served their time in certain states, they can vote again. So, yeah, someone who holds up your grandma with a gun in New Hampshire ("Live Free or Die!"), will sooner get to have a representative in the government -- and, ergo, in DC's local policy -- than the hundreds of thousands of non-grandma threatening masses here in DC who want nothing more than your grandma to be safe -- and looked after when it comes to her female parts should she live in the District.
But lest the vision of octogenarian lady parts start to formulate in your mind, turn your attention real quick to this:
Well, then let's try this again. Here's a lovely 15-minute cooking show featuring a recipe for pad thai.
*And just to clarify, I'm not "pro-abortion," I'm pro-choice. And while I hope people use abortion as a last resort (the first is hopefully avoiding pregnancy either via abstinence or reliable birth control), the ability to get one safely in a clinic opposed to dangerously in a back alley should always be an option in a free country, no matter what income range into which a woman falls.