we built this city on...

I apologize for the lack of blog post yesterday. I'm sure you all cursed the e-gods that be and then proceeded to cry all day wondering about the fart jokes that could've been. Or maybe you were drunk all day because you think St. Patrick's Day is a holiday worth celebrating. Xenophobes. I don't see anyone celebrating the existence of Belarus with me!

Anyvay (said like an ex-Soviet), I've got a really good excuse this time and it's not because I'm sick or lazy. It's because I needed my jorts. I drove about 300 miles round-trip yesterday to pick up a f*cking pair of cut-offs. I rule. So do my jorts.

But before I went to retrieve my awesomely frayed cropped pantaloons, I met up with my friend Libby aka Lazerbitch, whose music career is about to skyrocket because she's the f*cking T-I-T-S! I mean, how can you not love this?



ICE CREAM IN YOUR FACE!

Also, did you notice the Claire Hux cameo at the end when she steals the mic??? I did. *sigh* I really should move to Baltimore...

Or maybe not. DC has demonstrated in the past that it has the potential to be a leading producer of awesomeness for the ears. I mean, this city produced the likes of Fugazi, Wale, The Dismemberment Plan, The Thievery Corporation and John Philip Sousa (!), so there must be something good in the water here (lead), right? RIGHT!

So what the hell? Why isn't all that lead in the water working its magic here? For the answer, I'll turn to DC's premiere music journalist and DC-ite born-and-raised, Marcus Dowling, who posted this note on his Facebook a couple of weeks ago:

So, I recently moved back to Washington, DC. The less said about the seven years where I didn't live in DC proper the better, but, I'm here, back to my city of birth, and I couldn't be happier. Yes, as always, if you read the page you'll read where I have rather extremely pointed things to say about the nature of the development of culture here, so, with that being said, I've decided to do my part to bring some DC cultural folklore back to the table. See, I love DC [editor's note: wait, give him a chance], and I think there's depth and worth here on a musical level on the level of, or comparably better than other cities in the US, and let's even extrapolate that to worldwide. But I think the city's lost its way. I'll posit this theory here. DC has become completely a city based around satiating the desires of a transient population. I think we've finally hit the tipping point, to the destruction of a unique DC culture. Yes, there are bands, acts, food, artists, etc., but none of it feels truly and uniquely organic as go-go, hardcore or even on another level, Cool Disco Dan felt 30 years ago. If people come and people go with alarming regularity, where's the need for creating concepts, styles, sounds and ideas that have any permanence, roots or truly soulful reality? I argue that there isn't one.

All the emphasisesses (that's the correct plural form) were added by me to, well, emphasize certain points where I think Mr. Dowling has hit nail on the head punched the jugular on the neck.

I mean, look what happened when I left last September. Everything turned to sh*t!

"Um, Marissa. That's complete balderdash. Everything stayed the same and, in fact, some new stuff opened that doesn't suck so hard."

OK. Fine. Whatever. Which brings me to my new point. Is DC changing now? Have the people who have remained here noticed this "tipping point" of suckage and grown sick of it? Are the collective "we" who've lived here more than two years going to start demanding a community again instead of passively letting crap be the password to pass for passable while we all wait to move somewhere else? I think maybe we are.

There are new bars opening up (The Passenger) that are making DC look like they know what they're doing liquor-wise. There are new music venues opening up (U Street Music Hall), which will hopefully encourage local acts to sharpen up and play more. And, most of all, I'm back.

"Seriously, Marissa. Your narcissism knows no bounds, you asshole."

OK. Fine. Whatever. But to borrow the words of Starship (not from DC), before we start building this city on rock'n'roll (save for a local band I've never seen but can't get enough of the name, Animal Genital, who will be playing Wednesday, March 24 at Velvet Lounge), we'll let Lazerbitch do it. Libby and her band are rolling in for a gig at The Hotel on Friday, April 9! Be there or be, uh, not there. It really is your choice. However, there is a right one and a wrong one.

Now if only Claire Hux would show up, too...