sam champion sucks, but these links rule

You know what's awesome? Waking up at 5:30 am to the sound of blaring car horns, a garbage truck and a crazy man ranting about something in Spanish. Thumbs up!

What's even more awesome? Not being able to fall back asleep and staring at the ceiling listening to how shiteous the weather is outside. Woot!

And the most awesome? Being awake when the alarm finally goes off at 6:30 and it's still pitch black outside. Yay!

But wait, it gets better! After peeling yourself from the bed, you go to take a shower and suddenly your hot water is out (what is this? Russia?). Hooray!

So you turn on the television to catch the morning's headlines while you eat your Fiber One (shut up about that!), and that asshat Sam Champion, Good Morning America's ridiculously annoying weather-douche (pictured creepily above), is in the midst of explaining through his cheestastic grin that it's going to rain all day! All right!

And this is super f*cking duper when you know you'll be spending a good majority of the day going from Point A to Point B to Point C talking wonk all day. "You'll want an umbrella!" Damn you, Champion. Damn you and your penchant for the B'n'T blazer and jeans look! LOL!

But while my day is most likely going to end with me in jail, those of you who are actually lucky enough to chillax in an office all day (I know, I can't believe I just said that either...) can peruse other people's blogs that I actually do find awesome. However, since I get the feeling most of you are probably aware of and already read many of the DC-based sites to which I've chosen to link, I won't bother summarizing their strengths. Instead, I'll take the next few sentences to summarize and/or introduce for you (are you even still reading at this point?) my favorites outside of this bitch of a Beltway.

MOSCOW DOESN'T BELIEVE IN TEARS -- This is the best blog about Moscow I've ever seen because it's so damn accurate. Welcome to my former world. (Note: Sometimes NSFW.)

BLOGISTAN -- Did you ever wonder what kinds of shenanigans can occur while traveling around Central Asia? Shenanigans you wouldn't believe, according to a couple of friends of mine.

STIL IN BERLIN -- Street style in Berlin is the scheisse!

DREAMECHO -- I really wish I was friends with this girl while I was in Boston. Her outfit invention skills are sick.

THE CLOTHES HORSE -- The same goes for this 20-year-old located somewhere in Pennsylvania. Her sh*t is tight.

BROOKLYN VEGAN -- Don't worry, this site has nothing to do with veganism or even vegetarianism. It's about music news and happenings, although mostly in NYC.

TEETH -- This San Francisco-via-Boston blog authored by a friend of mine is a grab-bag of awesomeness, covering everything from motorcycles to music to his mom's cooking skills. Check it.

So, in closing, whoomp there it is! (Did I really just type that? Apparently lack of sleep makes me think of early-'90s rap duo Tag Team, um, in Spanish?) And who knows, if I make bail, perhaps I'll have another retardulous story to tell sooner rather than later. Ciao!