Thursday, March 5, 2009

e-lost and found

For those of you following me on Twitter (by the way, I almost "tweeted" this last night: "I like popcorn."), you may have caught onto the fact that I love the show LOST (and hate The View, but that's another non-story for another place in the space-time continuum). Anyway, LOST is truly a smashing television program because it's not simply just another show to me; it's a work of art. Unlike normal television shows not catered to freaky geeks who love weird science, LOST's complicated plotline finds its base in theoretical physics where time is malleable, magic dudes with a knack for eye-liner application never age and, well, finally I prefer the blond to the brunette when it comes down to who's hotter between two of the main protagonists, Sawyer or Jack. Sawyer, hands dastardly down and shirts heroically off, is WAY hotter than Jack. In fact, every (non-morbidly obese) male character, save for Benjamin Linus, is hotter than Jack because Jack, as it turns out, is a major tool. (As is Benjamin Linus.)

Jack's problem is that he's conventional, boring, an uncreative thinker and, most importantly, way too goddamn serious all the time. Jack is DC. Sawyer, on the other attractive hand, is the antithesis. He's unconventional, entertaining, extremely creative and funny. He's also apparently an avid reader of actual books and not just The Economist on the metro, which makes him representative of some sort of far-off magical island where all of your dreams come true. Wait. No, that's John Locke (not the philosopher, but yet another LOST character). Which means Sawyer is simply other-worldly. He's representative not of some place, either conventional or strange, but simply of himself -- a quality that seems to be becoming increasingly rarer these days and not just in DC.

People no longer follow their dreams or pursue happiness the way that I believe it was intended in this country. And while some modern-day folk may be perfectly content with their lives as they exist (whether it be because they can afford the high-end call girls, have the all-access badge to Congress or something equally as douchey...or maybe they're just genuinely bastards!), judging from most of my conversations with people (including many in-depth ones with myself...), many of us are not. I'm not. Or at least I wasn't. But I'm working to change that, which is one of the reasons why my blogging has become rather irregular (unlike my bowel movements -- thank you, beans!)

While I was toiling away in a job I felt no real connection to (like so many of us do), blogging was my main creative outlet. I set aside about an hour or two a day to let my mind flow freely and my fingers tap out rape jokes aplenty. However, since I stopped working my day-job, I now have 40+ more hours per week to focus on what I truly want to do, which so happens to be (probably unsurprisingly) creative writing. Weirdly, with these new projects (one of which happens to be a sitcom pilot, so if anyone has any experience/connections/etc. to that business, please feel free to contact me), the blog -- my once-upon-a-time primary creative outlet -- has become almost unreadably secondary.

And for that I apologize. But what can a girl do? I can't waste all of my A-list cancer jokes online. After all, if you give away the milk for free, who's going to buy the cow? (Yes, I'm pretty sure that's exactly how that phrase was intended to be used.)

But I digress. What this all means is that I'm probably not going to be blogging every day anymore. Last month, as you probably noticed, my posts were subpar at best. I am actually even e-ashamed of some of them. So, let's put those duds in the past, shall we? And instead focus on the future, albeit a more sporadic future, but still a future nonetheless. And a bright one at that. Hopefully brighter than that of Timbuk 3, whose one hit is so apropos right now that I can't help but post it in all of its "VH1's Where Are They Now?" glory:

But for reals, thanks for sticking around with me despite that I've become a sh*tty blogger. And, no joke, if anyone knows anything about the sitcom industry or is possibly interested in comedic acting in what may eventually become a DIY pilot (hey, that's how "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" got picked up!), email me here: It's time to get legit. Or at least as legit as this:


Shannon said...

I've stopped posting every day myself - and I find it very liberating. All that extra brainspace is going toward improving my wardrobe choices.

Let me know if you need help with any of your projects!

Matthew Mann - Pittore said...

Dude! Sawyer! Really! That guy looks like Nickleback. At any rate, that show lost me, heh heh, when they returned to the island and got gunned down by flaming arrows. This whole thing is going to end like Solaris I bet. Then everyone's going to say, ", wow! That's how we all live. What a profound statement." And I'm gonna be all like, "It's effing Solaris!"

You should write a grant to get start up some money for your project(s). All the kids are doing it these days.

Daniel said...

Agreed; Lost is the greatest show on T.V. I actually get to think about things when I'm trying to figure out what's going on. Also, Kate is starting to be a total suckass.

Missy said...

I will disagree. Linus A) hotter than Jack and B) many things negative, but not a tool.

Anonymous said...

Jack is perhaps the biggest tool in Hollywood. I say perhaps bc Kate certainly gives him a run for his money for douchery. He has one of the worst cases of bitchy man syndrome ever.
and Sawyer does NOT look like Nickleback. so you think all white guys look alike? Maris who the hell is reading this blog that they know who Nickleback is? I had to google them/him.

Matthew Mann - Pittore said...

An informed citizen.

Marissa said...


Thanks for the offer. I'll keep the e-sphere posted for sure.


Regarding the later comment, I too had to Google Nickelback to see what the dude looked like, although, I am familiar with their, um, "musical work" or whatever. I heard about the Great Depression artist subsidies. Obama should bring that kind of welfare back to benefit me. And others. But not the Others, who are evil. Or are they? Yay! More dorky LOST references! You're welcome.


Agreed re: Kate. She was much cooler as a criminal.


YOU ARE NUTS. Linus? Hotter than Jack? REALLY?! And not a tool? Are we talking about the same Benjamin Linus??? The one who's a weasly little bitch? I am interested in your argument.


Maris? Um, fair enough because YOU ARE RIGHT. Sawyer looks nothing like Nickelback. That's ludicrous. Wait, so Jack and Kate are bitchy in real life? Really? Even with Party of Five and, uh, no prior career history as the only other experience on their resumes? I don't get it.