A literate reader forwarded me an article from Rolling Stone the other day and, to my chagrin, it wasn't about Jonas Brothers. Instead, it was about all the ways DC has changed since Barack (we're on a first name basis now) moved to town.
Um, really? Again?
I feel like we've heard this before...or several times. And every single time, I come to the same conclusion: what a bunch of bullsh*t.
Newsflash: DC is STILL full of politico douchebag types. That's what this city was built on. And it's probably what this city will prattle on being until the world ends or the system collapses or my helper horse Sven gets sober.
So, needless to say--let alone type--I am upset with Rolling Stone for wasting valuable column inches on drivel like this:
Nary is a Jonas Brother even mentioned! Instead, it's all about how "Shaw" (which, by the way is not even really on the map) is totally the coolest neighborhood in DC now. This is a non-starter with me because, really, there are no cool neighborhoods in DC. There may be neighborhoods that are more tolerable than others, but just because you don't feel the need to stab yourself in the face all the time, doesn't mean it's cool.
My other major contention with these two pages is the Power Shift table, which looks at "what's in and out of the nation's capital." First of all, nothing is ever "in" in DC except for khakis and humidity. Secondly, how embarrassing is it that we traded in Jack Bauer for Oprah Winfrey as our cultural icon? While both can kill you, Bauer's methods of assassination are so much cooler than Oprah's. She wants to kill you slowly; Bauer wants to kill you quickly. And, apparently, to the soundtrack of Rammstein. And at least Bauer is fictional...
Now please, mainstream media, come up with some new material. Or at least get back to covering more important topics like what the Jonas Brothers are wearing.
Oh look! Ladies' jeans! I think I have that exact outfit being sported by that Jonas on the left. Sanjaya. Or whatever his name is...