respect to the man in the ice-cream van

Uh-oh. I received this comment yesterday to my post equating the weight of two dumpster babies to a bushel of baked beans: "...[T]ry to make some sense in the future. I know it's your weblog and all, but I just think that a modicum of coherence can be nice."

I apologize. I think the correct ratio would be the weight of three or four dumpster babies to one bushel of beans. My bad.

But while I can easily explain my nonsense away with, well, more nonsense (it's a downward spiral over here), I'm not sure how the Goethe Institute can logically explain why they would invite me to a blogger PR event knowing full well that in all likelihood I'm just going to use them as a non-sensical segue to talk about more beans and more dumpster babies!

And might I add, "Mein Leiblingshobby ist essen Bohnen! Ja!"

Holy Scheiße! I speak German. That is, I speak German if the only thing I need to ever say is: "My favorite hobby is eating beans. Yes!" Which, actually, would probably get me at least a meal or two on Munich's aptly named Schittgablerstrasse.

But seriously, the Goethe Institute must have no idea what brand of shambles they're dealing with here. I mean, I'm the chick who started a party conversation the other night with, "When do you guys think the Hitler mustache will come back into fashion?" (After a long discussion the consensus was that besides cats, the only people ridiculous enough to try to sport "der Hitlerbärtchen" will be a crew of 18-year-old dipsters in 2050.) It'll probably (ironically) go something like this:



Oh boy. The Goethe Institute is probably soiling their Lederhosen right now wondering why they laid out their very best Charles Shaw chardonnay for me last night...



OMGOMGOMGOMG! Germans (when they're not Hitler) are hilarious! Can you blame me, Goethe Institute?! CAN YOU?!



Oh, Augustus Gloop...! That's a classic!

*sigh*

But fine. Enough tee-hee-ing at the culture that continues to bring the world the technotards of Scooter.



Wow. Okay. Even I have my limits about how much nonsense one person should have to take and, fahrvergnügen, if I didn't just hit my proverbial Berlin Wall. Which means, let's discuss something that may actually add to your life! Whaaaa? Ja! Let's discuss the Goethe Institute's upcoming EuroAsiaShorts film screenings, an event that starts June 2 and will go six nights. Hey, it's free! And also, might I add, quite entertaining.

They screened a sneak-peak of one of these films, "Formic," by German film students Roman Kaelin and Florian Wittmann last night, but apparently, the film school they attend, which allowed them to make the film, is a bit, um, Nazi (zing!) about allowing them to show it on the Internet...



But if you trust my opinion at all (which, of course, I've given you absolutely no reason to), I can tell you that it was really good and I look forward to seeing the rest. Thanks for not sucking anymore, Germany!