at least i just made this delicious egg salad for lunch

What a goddamn week. That's really all I have to say, especially since I only have a few minutes to compose today's edition of The Anti DC, which, if you don't know, I've started describing as "A Satirical Look at Life in DC," opposed to the previous catchphrase of, "The Internet's Dumpster Baby." Although, now that I mention that last one again, I'm wont to change it back. Or maybe like that movie "Splice," which I will never see because I'm as scared of horror movies as I am of my own exterior melting off and exposing my circuitry and wires, I'll squish those two catch phrases together to create a hideous monster: "The Anti DC: A Satirical Look at Life in a Dumpster Baby." Done.

And keeping with this 'tardy stream-of-(barely)-consciousness, let's remain on the topic of film. Anyone seen any good ones lately, you know, besides Hubble 3D and The Room? I've got the inkling to cut off my arm and leg and see a movie in the theater again today. I hear Sex and the City 2 is a riot. Or at least this review of it is.

Ahh, look at me linking to week-and-a-half old news! That's adorable. But not as adorable as THESE BABY SLOTHS!

Wow. So, now I'm linking to one-year-old sh*t. In Internet years, that's more like 102 years old. Just like Joad Cressbeckler, who I find hilarious, even when he says racist things. Or maybe because he says racist things...but he's old, and a product of The Onion, so clearly, it's OK.

But you know what's not OK? Probably this race-based question I'm about to pose: Why is it that I only get compliments on my clothing choices from black people? Are white people in DC just meaner, less fashion-forward, or are they simply more shy? I want all races of all ages and of all class levels to appreciate my outfit invention skills! Just like I appreciated this week's outfit invented (or re-invented, actually) by Lady GaGa:

Lady Gaga as Larry King! Brilliant!

And speaking of brilliance, it's National Spelling Bee season, which I'm proud to say is apparently considered a "sport" in DC, at least according to the Washington Post.

Hey, watch me spell! R.I.P. Ding! But a sad "ding" because it means another Golden Girl left us this week. And while I'm not taking Blanche's death as hard as I took Sophia's, I'm still pretty bummed.

Ha! I just linked to something *I* wrote *two* years ago! Alas, we've come full dodecahedron, which I'll have you know, is really hard to spell, unless, of course, you're this kid:



CLIP FROM FIVE YEARS AGO FOR THE WIN! Have a good weekend!