shakers and shockers

For those of you who were snuggled up tight in your hyperbaric chambers last night like me and didn't notice the earthquake in DC this morning, it went down like this:



In other words -- nothing. People in Chile and Haiti are giving us the collective finger right now for even making this a news item, but I don't know... If anything spells doomsday, I think it's Evan O'DORNEY (don't f*cking forget!) and minor tremors earthquakes in DC, where THERE AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE MINOR TREMORS EARTHQUAKES! (Today's task: Reinforce my hyperbaric chamber's crossbeams to make them doomsday-safe.)

In other news, HILARIOUS TESTUDINIDAE PORN! Well, I feel uncomfortable now. But don't blame me, blame Animal Planet for alerting me how f*cking funny it is when tortoises do it.

And speaking of doing it (and by "doing" I mean "drinking" and by "it" -- "liquor"), I suggest doing it at The Passenger, which I've long touted as my favorite place in DC to drown my sorrows in. And Bon Appetit magazine agrees having named it one of the nation's Top 10 venues to drown your sorrows.

Also, I want to alert your attention to the Bicycle Film Festival, which is currently going on but I probably won't attend because I'll be too busy riding my bike to go watch Inception instead, which received 9.6/10 stars on IMDB with 2,763 votes counted. That's the highest rating ever so far so...

Lastly, more tortoise sex! Super-sized!