Wednesday, August 13, 2008

mob justice thrice!

Mob justice is so 2008! For the third time in just over a month, a group of DC residents served up some justice on a khaki platter to a possibly retarded criminal. This time, instead of chasing down a gunman or Bob Novak, however, the criminal was an even sicker freak, who sexually assaulted three women within hours of each other downtown.

According to The Examiner, "Police have charged Edwin K. Wright, 23, with two counts each of sex abuse and assault, following a string of incidents that ended when a group of citizens tackled the man at 15th and K streets."

You go, mob!

Seriously, if the DC police aren't going to protect and serve, at least our neighbors will.

Luckily, though, the police decided to do some work and connected Wright's string of crimes together, which means he'll (hopefully) be locked away longer or given the mental help it seems he so desperately needs.

Anyway, Wright began his spree by punching a woman in the back of the head (uh, seriously?) on Pennsylvania Avenue. He then ventured into the Farragut North metro station, where he tried to go to second base with another woman, before moving out to 1500 K Street, where he really demonstrated how much of sick bastard he really was. While normally I'd conjure up a fine rape joke for the purposes of The Anti DC, I'll refrain from doing so because there's really nothing ironic or funny about this. It's just sick and wrong.

For real, DC's mob of justice, thank you for doing good and stopping this nasty, gnarly, sick freak.


Adam said...

Um, that is truly some fantastic Photoshopping you've done there. I look forward to more eagle/medallion collages.

BAD said...

When I think of rape, mob justice, and funny, I think of this:

But it's also sick and wrong.

maryjanejeff said...

Bad Boys
Bad Boys
Whatcha Gonna Do
Whatcha Gonna Do
Mob Comes For You

Anonymous said...

Dayumn I was hoping this happy story would end in some frontier justice-style lynchdown. Like that Pace Picante Sauce commercial... "Get a Rope". (pete)

Gilahi said...

"A fine rape joke"? Even George Carlin couldn't pull that one off.

Marissa said...


Thank you. Although that's not even sophisticated enough for Photoshop. That is straight up MSpaint. Old school!


I owe you exponentially for posting that link.


Oh, Cops. Is that even still on the air? It should be.


"This stuff's made in New York City?!"


I'll have you know I've pulled off numerous fine rape jokes in my past. In fact, just last week I think I had a good 10-12. It was a good week.

Anonymous said...

I found your post...entertaining and informative. I'm glad to see people out getting the job down.


Marissa said...


Wow. Entertaining and informative? I'm flattered that something I wrote even meets one of those descriptives...Thanks!