the anti dc bizness proposal

All right, DC, I'm ready to do business with you.

Remember when I called you all intentionally ugly yesterday? (Scroll down). Tee-hee!

Well, I'm going to attempt to do the least (really) that I can do to help DC's ladies stop being ugly. However, if anyone bites my offer, I ask you to do me a little favor in return. Trust me, this will be awesome.

OK, I'm going to change your world now: Check out http://www.hautelook.com/. My personal story: I got two pairs of $200 Habitual jeans last week for 75 percent off. For those of you not superior at math, that's $50 per pair. Hot damn! And yes, they're tight and beautiful.

Basically, the site hosts online sample sales. Last week it was Habitual, this week it's Tracy Reese (who makes some beautiful coats, which are currently 60+ percent off on Haute Look), next week is Kale handbags, the week after is alice + olivia, and so on and so forth. Their sh*t is tight, meaning most of the clothes and the prices will make you less ugly without (completely) emptying your wallet.

And speaking of wallets, this brings me to my business proposal. I -- as does anyone who registers for free -- have the power to "refer" people on this magical site, which means I would get a $10 credit to my account if you ever make a purchase.* So, if my calculating is correct, that would mean I could collect about $1 million dollars! $30 in store credit. Ka-ching!

Also, feel free to throw in the following in exchange for these last few paragraphs:

• DJ turntables and mixer;
• Loeffler Randel Emmy D-Ring Elka boots in taupe, size 8;
• MacBook Air (with DVD add-on);
• "Round-the-World" plane ticket;
• This luxury loft; and,
• This.

*And yes, I'm serious about you being serious about letting me refer you to this fine online shopping establishment. So, if you want to make my day, E-mail me [theantidc@gmail.com] and I will send you the link. And a sweet photo of Norm Coleman. It's a win-win. Trust.